by Pamela K. Kinney

Austen, Jane and Winters, Ben H. Sense and Sensibility and Sea Monsters. Philadelphia: Quirk Productions, Inc., 2009. 344 pp. $12.95. ISBN# 9781594744426.

I have seen the book, Pride and Prejudice and Zombies, in bookstores, but haven’t picked it up. When I had the chance to read and review Sense and Sensibility and Sea Monsters, I decided to not let this opportunity pass.

The story begins with the death of the sister and housekeeper of a man, Mr. Dashwood. Lonely, the elderly gentleman invites a nephew, also a Dashwood, Henry, to live in his home. Henry has a son from a former marriage, whose mother passed away and left a fortune to the son. Henry is remarried and has daughters, two of them: levelheaded Elinor (sense) and impulsive Marianne (sensibility). But when the elder Mr. Dashwood died, it was revealed that the estate was secured to John, with the girls only receiving a thousands pounds a piece. During this we find that Regency England is going through what is termed the “Alteration”, where all the sea creatures of the world have mutated, becoming murderous predators and dangerous to humankind.

Not long after this event, Mr. Dashwood takes it upon himself to prove a theory of his, by damming up a noxious stream that may have been the cause of the Alteration. Unfortunately, he never makes it, but instead, is attacked and eaten by a hammerhead shark. His body washes up on the shores of the area nearby where Dashwood house stands. Before he dies, he makes his son promise to take better care of his wife and daughters.

Henry is buried and circumstances are not changed for the better for Mrs. Dashwood and her daughters. John has a wife, Fanny, and a child that arrived at the Norland estate shortly after the burial. Fanny convinces John not to fulfill his promise to his dying father. So now, besides having monsters to contend with, they also have Fanny, too.

The only bright spot in all of this for the eldest daughter, Elinor, is the coming of Edward Ferrars, brother of her sister-in-law. Even Mrs. Dashwood liked the young man and approved. But the situation in the house grows more unbearable, especially as Fanny notices the attraction between the two young lovers. So, when Mrs. Dashwood and the girls are given the opportunity of a shanty on Pestilent Isle, part of a chain of small islands full of dark secrets and fiendish sea beasties off the coast of Devonshire, by Sir John Middleton, they take it.

Austen’s tidy tale is loaded with B-movie staples: giant man-eating jellyfish, sharks, lobsters, and sea serpents. When Marianne falls face-first into a brook and a giant octopus attacks her, a dashing young man, Willoughby, arrives in a wetsuit and spears it. In the original book, Colonel Brandon is unattractive to Marianne because he’s old and reserved. In this redone-over version, he has been cursed by a sea witch to have tentacles growing out of his face

In this mutated Regency England, prospective mates are assessed, not only by income and lineage, but also by their lung capacity and the ability to elegantly ride a porpoise. Elinor falls in love with Edward Ferrars while her romantic sister Marianne is courted by both the handsome Willoughby and the hideous man-monster Colonel Brandon.

This blending of Jane Austen’s biting social commentary of Regency England with 50s-scifi horrific depictions of sea monsters biting is a humorous poke at 19th century manners. It took time for me to plow through it and, though I am not as happy about it as many other readers, still, it managed to grow a little on me, just like the tentacles developed on Colonel Brandon’s face. Just not enough – one reading was sufficient for me.

You can purchase Sense, Sensibility and Sea Monsters through Amazon.com

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